Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
