so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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