i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
