He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I'm passing your future prison.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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