i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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