idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
