We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
