As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize