How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
time to smoke my breakfast
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
