and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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