I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
