She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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