I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
