Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
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