i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
