Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Randomize
