ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
