is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
