OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
