dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize