I think I can smell my own vagina right now
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
