I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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