We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
The feeling are messing with the penis
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
