I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Of course I have a pirate flag
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
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