oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Randomize