ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize