Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
