Only a mothe r could love this liver
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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