The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
