i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
