Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Randomize
