You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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