question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize