he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I supernannyed him into submission
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
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