How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
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They have a pepper shaker for pot.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
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Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
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