sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
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