Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
the day after is always just damage control
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
