i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
My day in three words: secret purse cake
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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