All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize
