I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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