They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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