For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
