Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
