she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Can I color on your dick again?
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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