yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
This house was built for laser tag.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
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