don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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