Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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