I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
