I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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