I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
