Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
